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Finding fitness (note to self)

I have to admit, I have not been a huge fan of fitness. When surfing on pinterest, I would glace at the fitness pins and quickly dismiss or even scoff at them.  I store-typed people into a mold of Fitness people tend to be vain, arrogant even narcissistic sometimes (some people, all the time LOL ).  I wanted my heart to remain humble. To be meek and to follow more of, what I thought was, a Biblical view on it.  I would think to myself random thoughts about their vanity and continue surfing on with recipes or schooling pins.

It wasn't until my best friend said she was going to get certified as a scuba diver. Her class requires you to run a mile in under 12 (?) minutes as well as swim some laps and such.  This idea made me furious.  I do not have to RUN in order to swim!  But, she took in stride and took on the challenge.

Around the same time this happened I randomly came across this blog Runs for Cookies (ironically enough, it was from a post of her before & after picture on pinterest). Her testimonial of how she went from being larger than I am to where she is today (down 125 lbs in 16 months).  She openly admits her struggles, her truth and I saw a LOT of similarities in her that I see in me. Here was a fat woman, now skinny who struggles with eating temptations and who STILL loves dessert!, She has made it; not just to weight goal but also to maintenance! 

Her journey and my best friend's newest adventure inspired me to take my first walk.  I went for one mile simply so I could try to support and grow with the 1 mile challenge my friend was going though.  My goal; be able to run one mile, in about 15 minutes, without stopping.

On January 11 at 15:09 ·Diana Sullivan was out walking. She tracked 1.28 mi in 36m:53s..

No, it held no records. It wasn't at all glamorous or something to brag about but, it changed me.  I found that I LOVED the way I felt after it was done and I wanted to do it again!. The problem was that I needed time for me to re-coop. My body was SORE the day after and it took a couple of days before I could get back out there again.

But I did!  Jan. 20th was when I started my every other day rotation and have, more or less kept to it since. And then some marital issues came to the surface that long needed  addressing. It caused a lot of emotional turmoil and I found that my workouts helped me emotionally as well.  I am watching as my body looses weight but is also sculpting into something new. I FEEL the muscles underneath the fat that still needs to be shed. I feel stronger. 

 Right now the only thing holding me back is my body. I want to do MORE, run longer, be stronger! However, when I do my body lets me know that I am pushing too hard.  I now walk 2 miles every other day but its a walk / run interval.  Unfortunately the running portion has lead me to shin splints so I am back on my gazelle for the heavy work. Fortunately the cross trainer burns more calories and builds my muscles at a faster rate; it's just not as fun.

Now I am turning into "one of those people".  I moved my workout up to 2 miles, every other day and just started adding some additional interval training to it. *I* am seeking workouts, looking at craigslist for equipment, and yes, posting pins on pinterest! LOL   But I am still not vain, I am not narcissistic, and I prefer modesty and humility.Apparently stereotypes don't work (duh) LOL.

I have had phases like this before in my life where I have worked out and lost a lot of weight but I did it mostly to fill lonely holes after lost relationships or because I had to (had to ride my bike to work and school, and walking got me out of the house). The difference now is that I am not working out because I am angry or "to make him jealous" or the because I have to.  I am working out for ME!  I am not embarrassed of my efforts as I used to be, having to hide away while I worked out. Now I am working for me. For my body. For my strength, For my health.  

I have no specific goals per say... I just want to continue... well?...continuing.  Ultimately I guess my goal is to be able to wear those cute yet modest summer dresses.   So... perhaps a size 14? Or maybe a 12?  Perhaps whatever size I end up that looks cute in a sundress. hehe

For now, I am very much enjoying the journey.  I adore the way I feel after I exercise and those post workout endorphins aren't too bad either! :)  I pray this time, it will be a lifetime love and equal commitment because this time everything about the journey is different. :D


Erica said...

Yay for you! This is so encouraging.

I have actually had a little bit of a desire to start walking/running. But I have a large list of excuses that I use. Do you run in the evening?

Diana S. said...

yes, for the most part I tend to walk / run in the later afternoon / evening. That tends to be when my day has wrapped up a bit and it fills the time between dinner prep and after school. :)

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